Friday, 20 November 2009

I have LHS

It is not written in the comment section of the previous post but a lot of people disagreed with me about Genève. Apparently Geneva's cool, the service is great, restaurants are stylish and have such a diversified choice in their menus, night life is buzzing and flats are easy to get. We don't seem to be living in the same town guys.

Anyway, there is one thing that you, dear reader, should know: I love to hate. It's wrong it's weird, it's messed up, but I love it. Everybody does that sometimes, but I think I have a serious case of the Love-to-Hate-Syndrome, a.k.a. LHS.

Why do you think I created this blog (which has been elected best blog ever in the previous poll)? It's to bitch about everything I possibly can. My friends had enough of hearing me complain about every single thing in this world, so now I write it all down in this blog and I force them to read it. I'm such a nice guy.

So living in Geneva is a blessing for me, I hate every single second of it; it's amazing all the hate-buzz I get here. Tram's late once, I write an e-mail to the TPG; I miss the train because I am one minute late, I get mad because everything is so punctual in Switzerland. So you see, I'm weird, I just love to complain. My friend challenged me last year to go one year vegetarian, and it's working (at least fully for the first 6 months, now I occasionally eat meat) and now he's challenging me to go ONE DAY without complaining; that's rather impossible.

Same at work, I hate my job (which I quit so it's fine), my boss and most of my colleagues. It's fantastic. I complain a lot, but at the end I'm happy.

For example, I truly hated an ex-colleague who resigned (I like to think I was part of this decision). He was such a cheap (he complained about having twins, and I quote "you ask for one baby, and you get two. It's expensive"), useless, overpaid, lazy asshole. He hardly did any work and we ended up doing most of his tasks. I honestly could have murdered him in front of his kids. But, I loved it - I use to disconnect his computer while he was in the middle of a trade (for his own portfolio), take the food out of his drawer and put it on the main table to share it with everybody - and made sure to say "thank you Marc for all these chocolates" (remember he's extremely cheap). I inverted some letters on his keyboard, so whatever he was writing was wrong (very childish, I know, that's why I won't put the rest of the things we did – I was not alone). And so on. When he resigned, I thought I was going to be happy - but actually, I felt sad after a while, and I miss him now.

Also, I hated my crappy cell phone. Two days ago, it wouldn't get any network, so I casually threw it on the wall, it broke into three pieces, and now I miss it because my new phone is SO perfect and always has network…I can't complain about it! And I have millions of other example.

So you see, dear readers, you don't have to take everything personally - I'm just taking the piss about life and I love it. I am trying to cure my LHS, but scientists don't recognise it as a real disease, so there's no real remedy. Next topic to trash: religion. Make sure you read it!

PS: I may have appeared to you as an asshole in this post, it's not true. I am a nice guy, I'm just sick, euhm...euhm...(fake cough)

3 comments:

  1. My God Fadi you're so funny, I'm spreading this post all over Twitter

    ReplyDelete
  2. you're a very very bad,bad, BAAAAAAAAAD GUY fadi!!!poor collegue of yours,poor old cell phone!miserable fadi what are you made of! just tell me where is your heart! and did you hear my friend about COMPASSION even on Ted.com they are talking about it!yes my friend there is a CURE for this and you know it!god bless your soul my friend... oh,oh...i ' m just feeling like a preacher right know... do you want to join the scientologist, to be a witness of jehovah ?i can help you for that you know...
    bon treve de connerie ya un truc ki est sur je te passerai pas mon cell pourri, crasseux, emmerdeur mais heureux avec moi!
    sinon merci!!! pour ton joyeux annif:))) je c k' au fond de toi il ya un COEUR ki se rapelle apres un jour de mon annif parceke c pas mon blog qui te la dit bien sur;))) he, he, he... gros GROS bisou mon coco!

    ReplyDelete
  3. So it was you who was doing all these pranks with me?!?!?!?!

    ReplyDelete